Belonging · Confidence · Determination · My Story · Outlook · Poetry · Understanding

Totalitarian Ruler

It has been a process in a world with no escape plan
A world where your skin color determines where you stand
I wonder late at night if this is the real world God put me in
He tells me through the scriptures He will never leave me behind
Then I come to think it is not really the world maybe it is me
Maybe I haven’t learned to overcome adversity being thrown at me
I think it’s time for me to be real and tell you what going on
I get yelled at by a man in my house; not for reasonable things
For things that honestly wouldn’t mean anything
He verbally abuses me and I have to stay awake
Stay awake and remind myself that everything will be okay
No one really knows how I feel when I go home at night
I just have a small hope in my heart that he won’t be home
I’ve learned to not have sympathy for him anymore
He is totally bipolar and doesn’t know it he switches too quick
He can be in my face one minute then joking the next
I’m tired of being his punching bag because now I’m weak
Weak from the crap he continues to spew to me
Tired but I’m as awake as I can possibly be
On my hands and knees to pray so that I can see
See my life run a course he wouldn’t see in me
Watch myself grow to be better than he’d ever be

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